Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time.
There are different types of bullying including social, verbal, and physical. While each may seem different in presentation, they have similar damaging affects to both the person being bullied as well as the bully.
Social Bullying (or Relational Bullying) involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. Some examples include:
Leaving someone out on purpose
Telling other children not to be friends with someone
Spreading rumors about someone
Embarrassing someone in public
Verbal Bullying can be written or spoken and includes examples such as:
Teasing
Name-calling
Inappropriate sexual comments
Taunting
Threatening to cause harm
Physical Bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. Instances include:
Hitting/kicking/pinching
Spitting
Tripping/pushing
Taking or breaking someone’s things
Making mean or rude hand gestures
For aggressive behavior to be considered as bullying it must include:
An Imbalance of Power: Kids who bully use their power—such as physical strength, access to embarrassing information, or popularity—to control or harm others. Power imbalances can change over time and in different situations, even if they involve the same people.
Repetition: Bullying behaviors happen more than once or have the potential to happen more than once.
Who is at Risk?
Generalizations of children who bully/are bullied have helped create the possible risk factors of who will obtain each role, however, not everyone who experiences these factors will experience the predicted outcome.
Children at risk of being bullied:
Are perceived as different from their peers, such as being overweight or underweight, wearing glasses or different clothing, being new to a school, or being unable to afford what kids consider “cool”
Are perceived as weak or unable to defend themselves
Are depressed, anxious, or have low self esteem
Are less popular than others and have few friends
Do not get along well with others, seen as annoying or provoking, or antagonize others for attention
Children at risk of bullying:
There are two types of children who are more likely to bully:
Well-connected, contain social power, overly concerned with popularity, and enjoy dominating others
Isolated from peers, depressed, anxious, low-self esteem, less involved in school, easily pressured by peers, or do not identify with the emotions or feelings of others.
Some of the traits they may possess are the following:
Are aggressive or easily frustrated
Have less parental involvement or having issues at home
Think badly of others
Have difficulty following rules
View violence in a positive way
Have friends who bully others
Effects of BULLYING
As I mentioned earlier, the effects of bullying effect not only the person being bullied. Bystanders and the bully themselves can experience negative effects. Bullying is linked to many negative outcomes including impacts on mental health, substance use, and suicide.
Kids who are bullied can experience negative physical, school, and mental health issues. They are more likely to experience:
Depression and anxiety, increased feelings of sadness and loneliness, changes in sleep and eating patterns, and loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy. These issues may persist into adulthood.
Health complaints
Decreased academic achievement—GPA and standardized test scores—and school participation. They are more likely to miss, skip, or drop out of school.
A very small number of bullied children might retaliate through extremely violent measures. In 12 of 15 school shooting cases in the 1990s, the shooters had a history of being bullied.
Kids who bully others can also engage in violent and other risky behaviors into adulthood. They are more likely to:
Abuse alcohol and other drugs in adolescence and as adults
Get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out of school
Engage in early sexual activity
Have criminal convictions and traffic citations as adults
Be abusive toward their romantic partners, spouses, or children as adults
Bystanders who experience bullying are more likely to:
Have increased use of tobacco, alcohol, or other drugs
Have increased mental health problems, including depression and anxiety
Miss or skip school
More information here.
What can I do to STOP Bullying?
October is National Bullying Prevention Month where schools and organizations across the country join STOMP Out Bullying™. The organization's goal is to encourage schools, communities and organizations to work together to stop bullying and cyberbullying and put an end to hatred and racism by increasing awareness of the prevalence and impact of all forms of bullying on all children of all ages.
Increased awareness and attention given to stop bullying behavior will send the message that bullying is not acceptable and research shows this can stop bullying behavior over time. Parents, school staff, and other adults in the community can help kids prevent bullying by talking about it, building a safe school environment, and creating a community-wide bullying prevention strategy.
Never stay silent, whether or you are a bystander or the one being bullied.
More information here.
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